| Scarf Girl | |||
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Saturday, December 15, 2001 ( 11:27 AM ) Scarf Girl I was watching an episode of The Simpsons that I taped from a few weeks ago. It was the one about where Mr. Burns falls in love with that cop. Well, in the episode, Marge was saying to the family how everybody should be coupled up. Oh, and then before that, while I was trying to find the right place on the video tape, there was a short segment on the news where the newscasters were talking about being single during the holiday season. They were saying how often people get depressed because everybody else seems to be coupled up and happy, and that singles often have the "what's wrong with me?" mentality. Then they went on to say stuff like couples always seem to have a secret language of some sort, and that they should include their single friends at gatherings even though most of the other attendees may be couples. Blah blah blah. I think I've been through this "being single" topic before. Sure, it's nice to be a part of something and all, but it's not essential to happiness, is it? I say that if you feel great about yourself and your life, then it doesn't matter whether or not you single or part of a couple. You know why that is? Well, being in a couple won't necessarily make your life great. You are what makes your life great. I know people out there who feel miserable because they can't find someone. Well, if finding someone is the only way they can be happy, then I say they may need to adjust their thinking just a bit. Being in a relationship requires one to bring something to it. It's that two-way street thing. You need to be at your best in order to offer the stability that someone may seek. This is all my opinion, of course since we all look for different things in relationships. Some people just want the fun of dating as many people as possible. Go out, have tons of fun and not really seek a commitment of any sort. A lot of other people are seeking the commitment. They want to find someone stable to be with. They are searching for their soulmate. They are searching for their one true love. They are searching for their destiny, the storybook romance, the happy ending. Hey, to each his own. I would say what people seek is based partly on their personality and partly on the stage they are in life. Younger folks may just want to have the fun, while people who are in their mid- to late- twenties may start thinking about seriously finding their mate. I'm not sure what the "right" age to get married is, but I suppose it is when you're ready. There is no real hurry, unless you want to have like... 10 kids or something. Okay, don't laugh, but I had/have this plan. I was talking to my roommate back in college saying I wanted to get married at around 27 and have my first kid at 30. But I wanted to know this person for at least 3 years before getting married. So when I broke it down, I figured that I'd have to meet this person and start dating them by age 24. When I told this to my roommate, she was telling me how if it's love and it's meant to be, you'd know it, and somehow, you don't really need the 3 year buffer thing that I was thinking about. Then I asked her how long she'd want to date someone before getting engaged. She said she'd only need 1 year to know if she could marry someone. Only 1 year? Holy moly! Well, I think I'm a little off schedule, but I guess things have changed in my mind. I think I'm starting to agree with what my old roommate said. Somehow, the more people you meet and such, the better idea you have of what you're looking for. After you find that, it's all a matter of letting the pieces fall into place. Although I'm starting to feel the pressure from my parents, I'm not really going to pay too much attention to it. There's no point to marrying someone who's not right for you. What's my plan? Who knows? I suppose I'm not going to date guys that I just want to marry. Sheesh, that's way too much pressure for me and the guy. One of my friends is always kinda yelling at me for being closed minded. After all, you date someone to get to know them right? heh heh... I'm sure he's going to read this too and say to himself "yep, that's right." Scarf Girl, signing off. # Friday, December 14, 2001 ( 7:30 PM ) Scarf Girl Hmm.. guess I suddenly got some inspiration on my next topic: How would you feel if you were second choice (in dating, that is)? # ( 7:20 PM ) Scarf Girl Heh, today was pretty cool. I got out at 2. So what did I do with the rest of my afternoon? I did a little bit of shopping for some gifts. I looked at my watch and figured that I could make it home in time to give my car a MUCH needed wash. After the trip up to Reno last weekend, followed by my snowboarding outting yesterday, my car was soooo dirty. Well, good thing it's all clean now. I must say that it's pretty tough to wash your car when it's so darn cold. heehee. One more week of work left. It's pretty sad, but I'm kinda excited to see what life holds for me. What is the next chapter of my life? How is 2002 going to turn out for me? I know that looking back at 2001, it was a pretty fun and eventful year. I suppose we all feel this way every year, but I feel like I've gone through a lot of changes and learned so many things about myself. If you asked me what I learned, I don't think I can put it in words really. It's more like a state of mind. So yeah, don't ask please. heehee. Yuck, my room looks like a tornado blew through it. Yeah yeah, I know some of my friends out there are probably saying to themselves, "yeah right," but it's true! I guess I've been bringing stuff back from the office and I just kinda dump it on the floor. Plus, I've got my snowboard and gear just kinda taking of floor space too. Ack, I think I need to find a place for all of my junk before it takes over my room completely! Okay, I think I've been pretty random with my entry today. I also haven't really been hitting the relationship topic in quite some time. Sometimes I see things going on and other times, people give me topics to write about. C'mon folks, give me something to talk about!! At any rate, have a happy Friday night, and a great weekend. Scarf Girl, signing off. # Thursday, December 13, 2001 ( 11:09 PM ) Scarf Girl Last season was my first real season of snowboarding. Sometime at the beginning of it, I set 3 goals for myself: 1. Carve somewhat gracefully. 2. Do a jump and actaully land it. 3. Do a black diamond. To my surprise, I manage to reach them. Guess if you go enough times with crazy boarders to "guide" you, then you'd eventually end up getting better. Heh, so I have recently tried to think up new goals to accomplish by the end of my second season. 1. Carve confidently down a black diamond. 2. Riding down the mountain with speed. 3. Go down "The Wall". So I am pretty pooped right now after managing to squeeze out 11 runs today. 6 runs before lunch, and then 5 more afterwards. Heh, I promised myself that I wouldn't have a big lunch, but I ended up getting food from the bbq that was going on... yummy bbq chicken with a lot of sauce... Here's the rundown of my day: (for those who know Kirkwood) Runs 1-4: Solitude (blue) Run 5 & 6: Cornice (black) Run 7: Solitude (blue) Run 8: The Reut (black) Run 9: The Wall (double black) Run 10: Solitude (blue) Run 11: Cornice (black) Isn't that nuts? I went up to The Wall. Now, they don't call it The Wall for nothing. Sheesh. Talk about crazy! Evidently, with enough smack talking and reasoning, I decided to just go for it. Was it scary? HECK YEAH! Was it cool? Absolutely. So neato, I already hit one of my goals! heehee. Oh yeah, for the last two runs, I donned my Santa hat and rode down the mountain. Hahaha, that was really neat. Okay, time to sleep because it was a very fun and exhausting day. Scarf Girl, signing off. # Wednesday, December 12, 2001 ( 9:56 PM ) Scarf Girl Woohoo! The rack-installing adventure is over and was a success. There were a few obstacles that we ran into, but I kept saying to my friend, "You are genius!" Turns out that my rear crossbar is a little shorter than my front crossbar. Also, the crossbars were originally set really close to each other, but my friend managed to move them further apart. Heh, also, my car is really short. I think that if I'm not careful, I might scratch the spoiler when I open the trunk because the boards might be sticking out too long. Hopefully I'll remember to take the boards off the car first. Onwards to the boarding!! Scarf Girl, signing off. # ( 7:35 PM ) Scarf Girl So I've definitely calmed down a lot about this phone thing. Of course, I'm still annoyed at the fact that NOBODY else can use that phone except for me... Anyways, I have temporary phone to use right now thanks to a VERY nice friend of mine. Thanks!! =) Anyways, I guess I'm going to need to refuel my mind since it's been pretty stressful lately with this layoff thing looming over my head and all. I think I'm very mentally exhausted from the rollercoaster ride that I've been on ever since the company was bought out. Well, only 7 more days of work and then it's all over. The stress comes mostly from having to decide what I want to do next. I have no idea either. I guess I'll just see where life takes me. In the meantime, I think tomorrow I'm going to call in sick, since I have not used any of them yet. I call it a mental health day. Gotta not only take care of the body, but the soul as well. So, I'll be taking my body and soul to Kirkwood for some snowboarding fun. I hope this time I'll actually get to board. It's going to be the first boarding day of the season for me! Yay, I'm totally excited about starting my 2nd season of snowboarding. Okay, gotta go put the rack on to the car now. Oh yeah, congrats to Dardy on his first day of work and much success at his new job. SG, signing off. # Tuesday, December 11, 2001 ( 3:22 PM ) Scarf Girl Disclaimer: Caution, I WILL be using harsh language in this particular entry. Please be advised. Children under 13 should not read this without the supervision of a parent or guardian. Okay, this is going to be the only time you'll probably ever see me curse on my blog... but I am so fucking tired of this world and all of its bad people. That motherfuckin' guy who stole my phone had the damn balls to answer it and ask for money! My friend was taking care of the service side for me. He said called it in to have it cancelled and checked one last time to see if it was off. Then the fucking dude answers "what do you want?" when he picks up the phone. He tells an obvious lie saying he just bought it off the street yadi yada. My friend asks him to return it to an at&t store, but the dude is like "how much do you want for it?" WHAT THE FUCK?? Fucking ASSHOLE!! Then my friend gives him the speech saying it was reported stolen and that if he tried to activate it, then he would be arrested. So he just hangs the phone up. I mean, really... the phone is no use to him. Who the fuck is going to buy the phone off of some sketchy looking guy? GRRRRRRR!!!! SG, fucking pissed off. # ( 2:34 PM ) Scarf Girl I can't believe it! Some M!#@$#@!$#! F!#$#$!#@@# stole my cell phone right out of my bag!! I was having lunch today at the Powell St. Mall food court and hung my bag on my chair with my coat over it. I guess because the strap is so long, the bag was not covered up by my coat. Well, a little while into the lunch, some lady is like "excuse me, do you normally keep your zipper open like that?" I check and notice my bag is a little open. I dig around and felt my wallet, but didn't feel my phone. WTF??? !#$#@!$@#!$#@!$#@!$#@!$#!$#@!@#$@!#$@!#$!@#$@!$@#$!@$#@!$#@! So yeah, someone stole my lovely cool Motorola v60. @!$!@#$@!#$!@#@$! SG, signing off. # ( 9:04 AM ) Scarf Girl Season Greetings to all! You know what? I realize that I love this time of year. I like all the holiday decorations that stores put up. I like all the hokey music that they play about good tidings and happy new year. I like bundling up, scarf and all, and walking outside when it's slightly chilly. Somehow this year, I don't quite feel the same about the season. Everything seems like a chore; buying presents, decorating the tree. I think I'll be the decorating the tree tonight. Right now, it's just sitting in the living smelling all "pine-y". It's a fluffy tree. Nice... Have I lost my holiday cheer? Hmm... I think I got a little of it back on my way to work. I walked by the Old Navy as usual, and it's got its holiday decorations. It is so festive looking! I smiled to myself and walked on. I thought about it and realized that I haven't been as excited about the season. Of course, having only 9 more days of work might have something to do with it. Plus, I know that looking for a new job now isn't the best time. Well, this year shouldn't be any different than the other ones. I know that my holiday spirit is around here somewhere. I think when I start wrapping presents and such, things will seem brighter. Oh yeah, and I've already received my first present and christmas card. Happy Holidays to you all! Scarf Girl, holiday cheering. # Monday, December 10, 2001 ( 3:15 PM ) Scarf Girl So I received a repsponse from Beefcake the other day about the cheating topic. Here's a little bit from his email: [begin email] I took her back later the first time... but couldn't do it the second time. Part of it had to do with my heart not being able to take the pain any longer, and another part just got sick of the whole situation. She admits and realizes now how badly she treated me... but, "too little, too late." [end email] In the email before that though, he said this: [begin email] Eventually though, I ultimately realized that I just couldn't trust her anymore... and trust truly does play a huge part in relationships. Almost as much as the feeling of love itself, I'd daresay. [end email] He talks about trust. This is so incredibly true. I say without trust, there is nothing in the relationship. I mean, can you imagine constanting wondering about where your SO is? Wondering if they're cheating on you? I'd say it's pretty bad to leave it up to you to imagine the worst. You know your own fears better than anybody else, and the worst thing that can happen to you that you can imagine is bad. Did that just make any sense? SG, signing off. # ( 9:04 AM ) Scarf Girl You what kind of music I really like? Christmas music. Yeah.. that hokey-jolly-happy-fun Christmas music. It's just so... happy. heh heh. I remember at the casinos, during the tournament, they were playing all those fun songs "Jingle Bell Rock", "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer." You know, those fun songs. hahah. Geez, the atmosphere was all jolly, and there I was, trying to be serious while bobbing to the music. So I hadn't gone bowling in a while. I don't even remember when was the last time. Well, on Saturday, my brother and his two friends (G & A), decided to head over to Circus Circus for some gambling and some stuffed animal winning. On the way there, we decided we wanted to go bowling instead, so we went to the Starlight bowling alley. Yuck, rental shoes. I wish I had my shoes with me, but why on earth would I have brought them with me? Anyways, we decided to team up school yard style (boys against girls) and play for dinner. Best out of 3 games gets dinner. I found that the shoes were super slippery, and after my first 4 frames, I think I totalled maybe a 15. That was soooo pathetic on my part. I bet G was worrying about having to pay for dinner as was I. Anyways, I picked up the pace and miraculously ended up bowling a 105-ish. Talk about a comback! That meant bowling like... 90 points in 6 frames.. heh. cool. So we ended up barely winning the first game. On the second game, I busted out of the bowling blocks getting strikes and spares. Too bad I spazzed out on 2 of the frames, getting a 3 and a 4. Darn, wasted my 2 consecutive strikes too! Yuck... but I managed to salvage out the game to get a 115. Not so bad, but thank goodness G is a bowling studdette! We won and I got to rub it into my brother. Hahahah! My brother and A wanted to go double or nothing, but G and I decided that we wanted our dinner, but we played them a third game for dessert. Hahaha, we ended up winning that one too! So that meant we got dinner & dessert too! Yum. We hung out at Circus for a little while and then headed back to the Nugget for dinner at the Steakhouse. Yum... prime rib... followed by white chocolate mousse... *drool*... dessert... mmm.. Scarf Girl, signing off. # Sunday, December 09, 2001 ( 11:31 PM ) Scarf Girl I would say that my weekend was pretty interesting. On Friday, when we drove up, I saw something totally scary. A family in a 2001 Maxima was speeding past us at about 75mph on the 80E right after the 89 junction. It was in the left lane, and then somehow, it sorta hit the trailer part of a big rig truck, which was on the right lane. I think it barely grazed the truck and the driver swerved hard to the left, hit a puddle, and started to swerve left and right like crazy. A few seconds later, the car lost control and hit the center divide and kinda bounced off of it. Eventually, it rolled to a stop in the left lane in front of us. Of course, we saw all this happen so we slowed down about 50 feet behind it. I must say that the car's cabin part stayed in very good shape, keeping its passengers safe. So good part on Nissan for designing it pretty safe. Too bad it didn't prevent the guy from driving so fast in icy conditions. Let's see... on Saturday morning, I played in the first round of the blackjack tourney. On my table, there were some experienced tournament players so I was pretty intimidated when I found out. Heh, I was making small talk to scout out the competition. Heehee. Aren't I just sneaky? So it was 30 hands and everybody started with a $500 bankroll. I was just cruising along while everybody was betting more than I was and winning their hands. I kept getting sucky hands, and while everyone else was getting blackjacks, I was busting, or barely winning. I was pretty stinkin' far behind (about $150-200) when there were only 6 hands to go. I decided that it was time to make a move. I had $450-ish and bet dumped out $150. Well, I picked up my cards and guess what I got? My 1 and only blackjack of the round. WHAT INCREDIBLE LUCK! Since it pays 2 to 1, I had just been catapulted into first place from that hand. So I managed to cruise through the rest of the hands, getting good cards. By the time the last hand came around, I was in a very good position to advance to the next round since the top 2 people from my table would move on to round 2. I was in such shock from getting the blackjack, that I don't even remember what happened on the last hand. I think it came down to getting good cards, and that's what I got. Okay, that's enough of that for tonight. I'll write more about the rest of the tournament tomorrow. Oh yeah, and for the record, I am by no means, a hard core gambler. Yeah sure, this was the second tournament I played in, but this is merely for fun. And it turns out that I played more hands with the $100 entry fee than I would have playing $100 worth of hands at a regular table! heehee. I think I like this tournament stuff more than regular gambling. There's more of a purpose in some respects. Plus, I have only a um.. "slight" competitive nature, so this sort of thing appeals to me. heehee. Although the tournaments are very exciting, it's quite tense at times. I think if anybody watched me play, they'd see me all stressed out looking during the last 5 hands. Plus, pretty much during the whole time, my eyes are looking side to side, sneaking a peek at peoples' cards and keeping a mental note on how much money they have. Yeah, I'm sneaky that way. I'm trying to be all stealthy without people noticing. I disguise it all with my random chit chat and a bright smile. Personally, I don't think that people take me as serious competition when I sit down. They see this little Asian "kid" sitting down and probably say to themselves, "Are you kidding me? Is she old enough to play?" Heh heh. Everybody else is mid-aged or elderly. They've probably been gambling long before I was born. It's cool though. I just fly under their radar and miraculous manage to end up advancing to the next round. I kinda like being the darkhorse sometimes. Okay, sleepy time. I hope I have time to rinse off my car tomorrow. It's so dirty now!! Scarf Girl, signing off. # ( 10:20 PM ) Scarf Girl So yeah, I just got back maybe 45 minutes ago. It was definitely a really cool weekend. Too bad I didn't strike it rich from my trip to Reno, which is why I'm actually home able to update my blog. Oh well, perhaps next time. # |
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